


Holmes and Watson, the Untold Tales

by Nebula5030



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Gen, Humor, I am so sorry, Missing Scene, My First Work in This Fandom, Rated Teen for a very brief description of intentionally badly written foreplay, Sherlock Holmes - Freeform, holmes/watson - Freeform, purely for fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-29
Updated: 2020-07-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:29:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25585954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nebula5030/pseuds/Nebula5030
Summary: Riker glanced at Data’s screen - a simple writing document, with no graphs or charts, and what looked to be dialogue and action descriptions. “What are you working on?”“I am attempting a rewrite of the ending of a 23rd century novel,Holmes and Watson, the Untold Tales,by Rach’Et Barlava.  I seem to be making good progress.”“A rewrite?” Riker asked.  “How come?”Data then paused in his writing, and turned to Riker.  His brow furled for a moment as he considered what to say.  “The premise of the story started strong, but I felt the ending was…unsatisfactory, and did not embody the true essence ofSherlock Holmes.The mystery central to the novel was all but brushed aside, and I felt the conclusion was not as clever as is typical of Sherlock Holmes stories.  I am attempting my own version; one that I believe will be better for the characters, and that the reader would enjoy more.”Riker walks in on Data writing fanfiction for a Sherlock Holmes story.
Relationships: William Riker & Data
Comments: 9
Kudos: 20





	Holmes and Watson, the Untold Tales

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Lion_owl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lion_owl/gifts).



> For Lion_owl, whose idle comment wondering if Data wrote fanfic spurred this idea, and whose suggestion that he had read a bad Sherlock Holmes erotica turned it into the abomination I have written below 🤣

The door chime to Data’s room sounded.

“Come in,” Data called, eyes not moving from his monitor as his fingers flew over the keys, adding word after word to the file in front of him.

The door slid open, and in stepped Riker. He lifted an orange card in his hand with a small smile. “I’ve brought you the results of the nebulae analysis,” he said. “Just dropping them off before I turn in for the night.”

Data stopped typing and he looked over at Riker with a smile. “Thank you. If you set it there on my desk I will get to it in approximately twelve and a half minutes minutes.”

“I can do that,” Riker said, stepping over. Data turned back to his monitor, fingers rapidly typing and Data’s eyes flicking back and forth to follow the new words.

Riker glanced at Data’s screen - a simple writing document, with no graphs or charts, and what looked to be dialogue and action descriptions. “What are you working on?”

“I am attempting a rewrite of the ending of a 23rd century novel, _Holmes and Watson, the Untold Tales,_ by Rach’Et Barlava. I seem to be making good progress.”

“A rewrite?” Riker asked. “How come?”

Data then paused in his writing, and turned to Riker. His brow furled for a moment as he considered what to say. “The premise of the story started strong, but I felt the ending was…unsatisfactory, and did not embody the true essence of Sherlock Holmes. The mystery central to the novel was all but brushed aside, and I felt the conclusion was not as clever as is typical of Sherlock Holmes stories. I am attempting my own version; one that I believe will be better for the characters, and that the reader would enjoy more.”

“That bad, huh?”

Data frowned. “I would not go so far at to call it _bad,_ simply… under-realized. That the element of mystery Holmes and Watson are typically associated with was not utilized as well as it could have been.”

Riker nodded. He set the card in hand down on the desk, and noticed a small blue paperback resting to Data’s right. _Holmes and Watson, the Untold Tales,_ the cover declared in loopy gold writing.

“Is this the book?” he asked, nodding to it.

Data nodded. “I had the replicator make a copy for me, so that I could peruse it at my leisure. You are free to look.”

Riker picked it up. He opened to a random page in the middle and began to read. Surely it couldn’t be _that_ bad -

_“Dr. Watson,” Holmes moaned._

_“Oh, please, Holmes,” Dr. Watson whispered against the shell of his ear as he brushed Holmes’s deerstalker cap off the bed. “Call me_ John.”

_“Oh, John,” Holmes whispered, hands moving to Dr. Watson’s trousers, and opening them to expose his throbbing -_

Riker closed the book, fighting to keep a smile off his face. “Data,” he started, trying desperately not to laugh, “I think you may have missed the, um, the _point_ the author was making.”

Data looked up, brow furled. “In what way, Commander?”

“This is _erotica,_ it’s not meant to be a mystery. It’s meant to… _arouse. Excite._ I don’t believe the author wrote this for the mystery element of _Holmes._ ”

Data paused for a moment, taking this in. “You believe the purpose of this particular story was to incite sexual pleasure, despite the inclusion of characters mainly associated with the genre of mystery?”

“Yes, Data, that’s exactly what I think.”

Data’s brow furled and he hummed. He turned to his monitor and flicked his gaze over it. “Well, I have already started my version, and I would like to see it through to the end,” he looked up at Riker. “Would you like to read it when I am finished?”

Riker chuckled, and he patted Data’s shoulder as he set the book back down on Data’s desk. “Sure, Data. When will you have it done by?”

“At the moment, the first draft is 102,534 words and is approximately 87% of the way finished. I plan to complete five more revisions to check characterization and arcs, and to make any pertinent changes, but I should have it completed before 21:37 tonight.”

“I’ll start reading it tomorrow, then.”

Data nodded. “Thank you, Commander. I look forward to hearing your feedback,” and with that, he turned back to the monitor and began to type once more.

Riker watched him for a moment, before he let out a small chuckle of amusement. “Well, I’m off then. Good night, Data,” he said as he turned to leave.

“Good night, Commander,” Data responded from behind him, Riker leaving to the sound of rapid keyboard clicks.

But it was just as he was about to step through the door that a thought occurred to Riker. He smiled to himself, before turning back with as calm a look as he could get. “Oh, Data, one last thing.”

Data stopped typing and looked at Riker.

“I think Geordi would really like that book; it might not have fit your tastes but I think it _exactly_ fits his. You should lend it to him.”

Data paused, considering, but then he nodded. He smiled faintly. “I will keep it in mind. Thank you, Commander,” before turning back to his monitor and continuing to type once more.

Riker nodded, and he chuckled to himself as he stepped out and imagined what Geordi’s face would be when he realized exactly what kind of book Data had given him.


End file.
